I spent my second Canadian Christmas out on the farm with J and his family; the very place where he grew up and started to become the person I now know. Upon arriving in Ontario on Christmas Eve, we were gifted with a white Christmas after all, a mild start to our winter in the west leaving our town a barren, snow-less place.

I want to tell you about this woman; my aunt Juliet, Julie, or “Bibi” as she was known in our family. I want to tell you what I tried to tell everyone at her memorial, whilst choking back tears, my whole body trying to contain all I was feeling to no avail.

A spontaneous camping weekend in late July, trying to make the most of the summer. When you’re surrounded by mountain beauty, getting away is quick and easy (and only half an hour from home); there are few excuses not to get up and go, and yet so often we all let life get in the way of the experiences, moments and opportunities that truly matter to us.

A moody, rainy day in late June. Our summer in the Rockies looked mostly like this, but the rain helped to keep the smoke from the wildfires at bay, for a time.

I was about to say that I wasn’t sure why blogging has been so hard for me in the last year, but I do know why. It’s hard to believe it’s taken me a year to blog these very precious memories with my brother and sister. My siblings are like pieces of my heart that only came to form after they were born; two of my safest places, they carry the parts of me I often cannot. They know me inside-out and they love me anyway.

This time last year—a hike with my siblings and my friends Bek & Chloe, enjoying our usual dance with winter in Kananaskis Country.

In many ways, and in the biggest of ways, this year has been a reset. When I think about why this reset feels more akin to having the ground lifted out from underneath me with no safe place to land, vs. a reset that is rejuvenating, clarifying, and a slate wiped clean, I know that it is because it is intertwined with the ever-complicated emotions surrounding loss.

We didn't know it at the time, but this would be our last weekend away together as a couple. In my 2017 year-in-review, I wrote briefly about how we struggled; how we worked hard to maintain our love and our friendship after months of bitterness that had been making its way into the smallest spaces of our relationship for what may have been the last 2-3 years.

Photos from when my brother & sister visited me during my first year in Canada.

Summer brought us a string of visitors from Australia; one of whom was my dear friend Annie. An incredibly talented photographer, I'd been quietly following Annie's work since she was 16, and even then she was blowing my mind.

On Sunday, M & I left home early to meet my family at Nobby Beach for my father's birthday. It's been a little while since we've had a family day out (or in my case, a day out at all)—with my sister living interstate and me having moved out of home since 2012, opportunities to have a day like this are so rare.

One of my favourite days, at some of my favourite places. Most of the photos below are from our afternoon at Fingal Head, a 40 minute drive north from Byron.